University Article Follow-Up
Recently, I noticed a ridiculously bad article that ran in the student newspaper of the University of California - Irvine. One student, Kevin Pease, voiced his opinions on fat. Guess where they fell?
Anyway, Kevin wrote me and asked if I would consider posting his response to your responses here. I said sure, so here it is.
I would like to start by saying everything I wrote in that article and here today was my doing, and in no way reflects the opinions of the New University. There was a reason that article was put in opinion, and if you do not agree with my views I encourage you to write a response for the paper.
My next point is to reveal my true identity. All of you believe that you have a deep insight into my views about the world based on a single, eight hundred word article. The fact is that I am just a kid who wrote a quick article for a student run paper in order to make twenty dollars so I could go to a bar that weekend. My views are not particularly extreme, I wrote something I thought my peers could enjoy while saying something about the world around me.
I also want to stress that every fact I mentioned in my article is entirely true and backed by scientific study. These are not magical ideas I pulled out of my head but figures and statements from textbooks. Being overweight is as much a problem to one's physical health as a number of other chronic health problems, but eating right and exercising is a solution. When I said that it was "not easy" I should have stressed how not easy it is. It takes years of hard work to lose weight in a healthy way, along with constant changes in order to combat your bodies [sic] ability to adapt to these exercises. For those people who read this and are exercising congratulations, you are making a commitment that will not only be beneficial to you but also to those around you because it will keep you in this world much longer. Those who have not, you are in no way less of a person for doing so. You have made a choice that I sincerely hope will make you happy.
As far as my intellectual capabilities and academic future are concerned...a psychologist is not your friend. They are not there to hold your hand while you do whatever you want. In order to cure phobias many of them expose their patients directly to that fear. The process is extremely uncomfortable for the patient but eventually helps them to grow as a person. My point being that what you call insensitive may mask honestly good intentions. Intellectually I am a straight A student who works incredibly hard. My grandfather was half Native American, virtually def [sic], unable to walk and nearly blind by the end of his life. I spent two years in highschool taking care of him because I loved him.
Yes, I can comprehend complex ethnic identities tied to disabilities. Also, when my head explodes it smells like strawberries.
Finally, I would like to take a moment to summarize my article since many pieces of it were taken out of context. Overweight and obese people can be allowed to do whatever they choose. However, at some point a line of accommodation should be drawn. The world should, but realistically cannot, be molded to fit people of all shapes and sizes. I conclude by hoping that many of you feel ashamed for reveling in my death based on a silly article I did not think would be a big deal.
There is no shame in being proud of who you are, but there should be pride in acknowledging other people's points of view and finding intelligent responses to them based on reliable information. Paul, please excuse the spelling errors I am a terrible writer. Thank you for your time.
Uh, thoughts?
Mine on first blush: I didn't see any comments here wanting him dead (!). There already is a line of "acceptable" fat in society, as evidenced by... everything... in... society; it's just ridiculously low. And, there are plenty of scientific studies that back up our claims as well.
On second blush: remember that anything you publish, even as an innocuous little article in a student newspaper, can and will get analyzed by someone on the internet.
We now return to your regularly scheduled programming. | But I read it in a textbook.
Posted by paul on April 21, 2008
*grin* i find it kind of hard to believe that a straight-a student would not understand the proper use of an apostrophe or misspell the word "deaf." i mean, even us straight-a kids understand how to run spellcheck.
sigh.
~Maggie~
A straight A student can't spell (or use a spell checker) or bother to do some research to find out how bogus their claims actually are? Interesting...
He is right about one thing. A psychologist isn't your friend. However they ARE meant to be empathetic. Empathy being something Kevin seems to be entirely lacking in...
And why should a "line of accommodation" be drawn? Why can't everyone be accepted for who they are physically?
Nice try Kev, but no A grade for this one.
So, it's okay to spout half-assed hate speech just so you can have beer money? Sheesh, I pity his future patients.
But to Kevin's credit, kind of: Big name newspaper reporters don't bother doing investigative journalism on these same so-called fat is unhealthy studies Kevin says backs up his anti-fat claims. They don't bother to look at the opposing evidence, or in who funds the studies. If professional reporters don't do this, I hardly expect some snot-nosed undergraduate kid to do it, either.
Because of course fat people have never, ever had to deal with crass thoughtlessness and insensitivity masked as being 'for our own good' or 'in our best interests'. Thanks for the advice, but I mean really, the tough love thing is getting boring - tell me something new. There's a well known saying about good intentions and quite frankly, it is those who seem to think that we need to be told a million times a day how BAD being fat is and how everything possible should be done to discourage it who are paving a six-lane expressway to Hell for the rest of us.
I am a terrible writer.
The most true thing he could have said?
Guys, do you remember being in college or just out of high school, and thinking you knew everything ever ever ever just because a textbook said it? Textbooks used to say that the gay was caused because mommy didn't hug enough. Pardon me if I don't acquiesce to some kid's appeal to authority.
I just hope that this entry and the one prior stay near the top of the google results for his name. People do google their doctors, you know.
My favorite part was "I also want to stress that every fact I mentioned in my article is entirely true and backed by scientific study. These are not magical ideas I pulled out of my head but figures and statements from textbooks. "
Because obviously, everything in a textbook is 100% true fact. Also, rather than failing or failing to support theories, scientific studies define Truth (but only the ones whose results support your world view, obviously).
Kevin's comment here:
"I also want to stress that every fact I mentioned in my article is entirely true and backed by scientific study. These are not magical ideas I pulled out of my head but figures and statements from textbooks. "
reveals just how uneducated he is. If he truly were a researcher or scientist of any type, he would learn in his very first laboratory class that research cannot prove anything, and can never be called true. Research can only disprove something or support an existing theory. For him to say that his article is entirely true reveals that he knows little about research. Too bad that does not prevent him from publishing on the net.
DeeLeigh, I have always thought that high school students should be forced to take a class in rational thinking and learning to study concepts as a whole. I do not understand how people my age in their early 20s can understand that things might be bias when talking about politics but they find it hard to believe that articles/books citing studies might also hold those same biases.
As far as I'm concerned he dug himself in deeper. But I appreciate his taking the time to affirm my personhood even though I'm not a good (read: dieting) fat person.
I didn't think that I could think less of this young man than I initially did. I was wrong.
Undergraduate textbooks are often incredibly inaccurate - one of my psychology professors once let us read the original article of a classic experiment (Schachter and Singer's experiment on the two factor theory of emotion) and then went through several undergraduate textbooks with us that described the experiment, pointing out the inaccuracies on the way. Very educational.
In addition to this, while I am not a clinical psychologist but I am a social psychology graduate student with a strong interest in clinical psychology and I have dealt with therapists as a client. It is certainly not a therapist's job to just reassure people (although that is part of the job, and not the smallest part). But a good therapist will always, always listen what it actually is that the client wants. If someone with a phobia doesn't want it treated that's the client's decision, not the therapist's - the therapist can encourage treatment if he or she thinks the client's phobia poses significant limitations in the client's daily life, but that's all. If on the the other hand the client wants the treatment it is the therapist's job to be as supportive during exposure as possible while at the same time reminding the client of the goal. Not every fat person wants to lose weight, and just as in case of a phobia it is not the therapist's job to coerce anybody into weight loss. (Actually, one thing that I like about the DSM-IV is that it usually defines something as a psychological problem only if the client sees it as a problem as far as I remember. There are exceptions for this, sure. But generally this is a very good rule.)
Finally, I cannot believe that a third year psychology major is not aware of the extend to which fat people are discriminated in modern Western culture. I would invite Kevin to take a look at the relevant research and also at the research on the consequences of discrimination for the individual. There is plenty of both in the current psychological literature. A therapist (and based on what he wrote I assume that Kevin wants to become a therapist) who isn't able to see the social context a person lives in and the effects this social context has on the individual can never truly understand his or her clients' life experiences and therefore will never be good at his or her profession. (And no - belonging to a group that is the target of discrimination yourself or having ancestors that belonged to such a group does not give you a free pass.)
(Edited to add: he does mention negative stereotypes of fat people in the original article. But honestly, I don't think he understands their full implications for fat people. Actually, he seems to buy right into them. )
Oh, and just one last comment: I don't want to see anybody dead, certainly not a young man, no matter how much I disagree with his views. And I sincerely try not to hate anybody. But at least according from what I can gather from the article and the letter above I assume that the writer still has a good deal to learn to become either a good therapist or a good psychological researcher.
"The world should, but realistically cannot, be molded to fit people of all shapes and sizes."
Um, really? Then is it ridiculous for the ADA to be advocating for accessibility for disabled people as well? Since, you know, it's a nice idea and all but we realisticially CANNOT accommodate everyone? I guess we shouldn't even try to accommodate then, say, most people, or some people? Where do you draw the line, exactly, and how do you get the authority to draw that line?
I appreciate that Kevin took the time to respond, and I obviously wouldn't agree with people making death threats or whatever. But dude, seriously, if you troll as hard as you did in your original article ("But it was just a joke! It was just for a student paper! It was just for the twenty bucks!") you're going to have to expect a response in kind. It's the internet.
And you might want to be aware that words have meaning, and to perhaps you should be a little more careful with them in the future. Referring to a social movement advocating equal treatment for marginalized people with an epithet (like "the flob") is probably not going to go over very well. Welcome to the real world, Kevin. You're a big boy now.
OK, it's been 20 years since I was in college, but I distinctly remember not being allowed to use textbooks as reference material. And that was before we had the internet, so we had to do actual research -- you know, in a library! Now, with the web, there is access to every known (and unknown) publication on the planet, and no excuse for shoddy research.
I'm also a bit stumped by the "line of accommodation" theory. As Paul mentioned, this line already exists all over the place. It's quite elitist, when you think about it. Why, exactly, should such a line exist? And who is given supreme authority to decide where that line is drawn? A 21-year old psychology student? ACK!
Disney's decision to make its rides more accessible is simply good business. It will bring more people into their parks and resorts, thereby making the company more money. If they wanted to be elitist and keep the fat people out, they wouldn't change a thing. And those fat potential customers become someone else's actual customers, spending their money in places other than Disney.
I wonder if anyone has given Mr. Pease some direction toward factual data on this topic... not just the rhetoric shaped by the $50 billion a year diet industry. Please, Kevin, read Sandy Szwarc's blog. If not the whole blog (because I know you've got some drinking to do), at least her "Obesity Paradox" series. And then read the book, "The Diet Myth," by Paul Campos. And "Rethinking Thin" by Gina Kolata. And "Big Fat Lies" by Glenn Gaesser. Get just a little bit of information that hasn’t been influenced or dictated by the diet industry.
I love his argument that his research is factual because it came from textbooks. They can be biased as well.
Clearly this dude is not going to become successful if he becomes a psychologist or therapist or whatever he does as he already has biases towards fat people. He, like all the other trollie-trolls, refuse to grasp that all fat people don't get fat because they spend too much time at the McDonald's drive-thru.
You know, maybe there is a job for him after all. MeMe Roth can hire him as another "expert" to shame and bully fat people into losing weight. Because we need more of those, don't cha think?
I was one of the ones who called for him to provide scientific proof that eating fruits and vegetables daily and exercising 4 times a week will make a person thin. He can't provide that because it doesn't exist. Now doing those things might provoke a weight loss or make you healthier, but there is no study I'm aware of that shows that morbidly obese BMIs are corrected to thin BMIs just by doing those things he said. There is a lot of scientific evidence to the contrary. The fact that he doesn't acknowledge this is troubling to me, as is the fact that he got paid to write an editorial. Not a slam against him, it's just that many people write letters to the editors of newspapers that never get printed, but he wanted to make a money to go to a bar that weekend. So the website or newspapers that pay for people's opinions really don't care about responsible journalism, they just want something provocative that makes people angry. They want hits.
There is no point in even trying to have a debate with the writer in this case. He says he's a kid who wanted to make a quick 20 bucks (in other words, leave me alone and stop taking this so seriously) and then he tells us something about himself, a child who had to take care of his grandfather who was half native American and physically disabled (in other words, that I am not just some average white person). It doesn't sound like he is open to discussion, but he wants us to see him as a person and not read anything into his character. You know, it works both ways. And I still don't see any defense of what he said about fat people comparing their situation to the most brutal form of slavery that the world has known. Nor any defense for calling fat people the FLOB.
On the other hand, you think you have deep insight into all our lives on the basis of five letters 'obese'.
Thanks, I'll admit I was fooled?
And that's what we want for you Kevin, for you to grow
Oh yes, next time you need twenty dollars, stick to something more suited to your talents.
Imagine, he calls fat people a bunch of lazy slobs to win $20 to go to a bar (THIN PEOPLE ARE ALLOWED TO HAVE VICES, PASS IT ON) and is ever so shocked to realize that not only might someone disagree with him, they might do it where he could be Googled for it! He must avenge his good name! He was only telling us fruits and veggies and four exercise sessions would make us all thin BECAUSE HIS TEXTBOOK SAYS SO!
So now I am asking my pancreas, my liver, my hypothalamus, my adrenals, and my gut flora why they have to be so difficult and disagree with Kevin's textbooks and everything. It would be so nice, and neat, and tidy for everyone involved if they'd just let me be thin and fit in and not incur Kevin's wrath. But they don't, and millions of others' don't either. Which is why I'm here. We are getting crapped on constantly for shit that's not our fault. (For every fat person who has "bad habits," there's a thin one whose "habits" are just as "bad" who does not suffer ostracization for it.)
Dude, I probably net-pubbed more words on this fiasco than anyone, between my post on FatFu and the cross-post to Shakesville, and nowhere did I say or even imply that I wanted Kevin to die. Far from it. If he dies, that does not increase the number of people with a clue. It's excusable to be naive at some point in your life, I'm pretty sure I wasn't all that much more enlightened when I was much thinner and could afford not to be. What's not excusable is claiming you have nothing more to learn. I mean, that's what you're PAYING for to have an education, right? (Yes, I know, how naive of me.)
Last year a local college was in an uproar over an article by one of it's students entitled: "Rape Only Hurts if You Fight it". Among some of the jewels in this piece were the sentiments that “[f]ar from a vile act, rape is a magical experience that benefits society as a whole,”
It really makes you wonder what our colleges are cranking out these days. If they are trying to mimic National Lampoon, their efforts are mediocre at best.
It also gives me pause that this young man degrades a whole group of people so he can afford drinking money. Now there's a future psychologist to avoid at any cost.
That is absolutely dreadful!
I like how he didn't even address the fact that his entire premise for the article is wrong. To wit: "But Disneyland, which plans to add an inch of depth to the water and construct lighter boats, said overweight tourists aren’t to blame."
Yes, Magpie, I wondered about that too. I didn't think that Disney planned to make the boats bigger, but to change the boats and flumes so the ride can accommodate a deeper draft, or whatever the proper term is.
Well, he's certainly a poor writer. His course of study is hardly what you'd call a "hard subject" - as in, it is not based on anything like a hard science, with hard facts to back it up. And despite having no medical background he presumes to make statements regarding health - most of which are demonstrably false.
All in all I'd have to say F. At the college level one could at least expect an iota of research, or a properly written and spelled opinion piece. Not a hate-filled diatribe full of myths, stereotypes and nonsense.
And by the way, that was nothing like an apology either. If it was supposed to be some type of apology, he sucks at it. Apology - ur doing it wrong!
Zero isn't a size, it's a warning sign. - Carson Kressley
Just...stupefying.
No. Scratch that. Just *stupid*: badly written, badly reasoned, self-pitying, self-congratulatory, and almost completely devoid of significant content.
My first reaction: which is it, Kevin? This was a "silly" 20-buck piece of fluff for a nothing newspaper, not to be taken seriously? Or this was a closely-woven tapestry of pure, glittering truth based on the latest psychology textbooks? I'm not sure these two apologias are quite compatible.
Let's pursue apologia #2. So "figures" and "statements from textbooks" are "entirely true"? How can an adult of normal intelligence even *say* such a thing without warning sirens going off in his brain? It's not that I haven't encountered this attitude before (from my students, in fact) but it never ceases to astound me.
"Being overweight is as much a problem to one's physical health as a number of other chronic health problems." Here's a writing tip, Kevin, free of charge: be specific. Get down to brass tacks. Give examples. Otherwise, you risk sounding like you don't really know what you're talking about or can't be bothered to do any research. At least name the textbook, for God's sake.
And another tip. The claim to be a straight-A student is impressive in inverse proportion to your audience's familiarity with the system of higher education in America. Nine times out of ten, "straight-A student" means "didn't challenge himself" or "worried more about grades than about real personal development." For God's sake, persuade your audience with your eloquence, the force of your ideas, and the weight of your evidence -- not with your transcript or the fact that you took care of your disabled grandfather.
I don't want to attack you, Kevin. I don't even know you. I just wish that thought had stopped you from attacking me.
Oh, you've all said it perfectly well already. This sort of thing pisses me off so royally. "Oh, why are you all upset? I just said that to get a laugh and go buy beer. Don't take things so seriously." Right. Feh.
You know what bothers me the most about all this? It isn't that he's utterly convinced his error is reality — I expected that. It's that he "didn't think it would be a big deal."
That's exactly the problem with this kind of thinking (not just Kevin's, but fat-hating culture in general). It's no big deal to shriek at fat people about how they are inconveniencing everyone else. In fact, it's "incentive" to get them to "do something" that will make them conform so others won't have to feel so uncomfortable around them; heaven forbid others who are uncomfortable *examine themselves.*
In other words, it's "no big deal" *because fat people don't matter.*
I can't thank him enough for the "permission" to like myself as I am and for "allowing" me to do what I please with my body. I also enjoyed the pat on the head about being a good little fattie because I exercise regularly, and, why, it was ever such a treat for him to explain the secret to weight loss to me: eating right and exercising is a "solution"!
Now, in fairness, I will say it took guts for him to respond to us. It's unfortunate, though, that he simply does not "get it" and, from what he wrote, he never will.
"The truth is that if you are fat, you must be told that you are fat so that you will do something to change it. If you are too obese to fit on a ride at Disneyland, make a note that you are overweight and do not ask them to change the ride for you."
I'm just picturing a person going through Disneyland with a post-it pad, taking down notes regarding all the rides she doesn't fit into. "Oops - don't fit into Magic Mountain - let me make a note that I'm overweight." And along the way the Disney characters stop each fat person they see, saying "Just so you know, you're fat. I'm only telling you so you'll do something to change it." "But I already made all these notes telling myself I'm overweight!" "Well, the fact is you still must be TOLD that you are fat or you won't do anything. Kevin Pease says so. At least, when he needs beer money."
We could even have a fat jar - each time a fat person tries to sit down on a ride and won't fit, they make a note, and have to put a quarter into the jar. At the end of the week, all quarters are sent to the Kevin Pease beer fund.
Zero isn't a size, it's a warning sign. - Carson Kressley
Intellectually I am a straight A student
What does this tell us about UC Irvine?
Seriously, Annie, I think you're on to something. What if all we all went around everyday with a little notepad, taking note of each incident where we were faced with the fact that we're overweight?
Yesterday, for example, I could have made a note of each of the hundreds of clothing shops I passed that don't carry my size, as I traveled for five hours around a huge metropolis (thanks, Dee!) to visit the three shops that do. And each time a perfect stranger takes it upon himself to speak to me about my body size in public, offering either his approval or disapproval. Or every time I have to go through a turnstile in the subway, or sit on a bus seat, or am too ashamed to buy fast food for my husband because I know the staff will assume it's all for me. Or all the times I've suffered through a 90 F summer day in long sleeves and pants because it's better than being objectified or harangued by strangers. And how, clearly, none of this shapes my identity WHATSOEVER, and it's not even remotely comparable to other forms of social stigma and oppression.
Then we could mail all the notes to Kevin. And keep the beer fund for ourselves
"Intellectually I am a straight A student"
Hey, let me translate: "I can read anything you tell me to and parrot it back out without ever questioning a word of it. You're going to love me! I've also somehow managed to get to an advanced stage in my degree without understanding that textbooks are wrong ALL THE TIME because that is THE NATURE OF SCIENCE, which says a lot about the level of critical thinking I've achieved."
(In my course -- because I go to a university worth going to -- our lecturers expect and demand that we go directly to source studies and examine them ourselves to determine whether their conclusions seem to have a sound methodological basis before we quote them anywhere. But hey, that's 'cause I've actually had an education, and that might get in the way of Kevin's drinking. Remember, it's okay to spout hateful lies if you do it for the beer money!)
In other words: "It must be true! I read it in a book!" The sound of a hundred grand well spent.
Huh. My psychologist hasn't said a word about my weight for the past three years. He actually listens to my concerns and understands that my social anxiety is triggered by people like Kevin. But I guess he's a bad psychologist, because he hasn't advised me to lose weight in order to be accepted by beer guzzling undergraduates.
And another word of advice - ever heard of the Golden Rule? Treat people the way you want to be treated? What surprises me time after time is that these outright prejudiced people get all offended and upset when others call them out on their nonsense. Gee, maybe that is because you were an asshole in the first place?
An actual psychologist could have a field day examining mindsets like this.....
It takes years of hard work to lose weight in a healthy way, along with constant changes in order to combat your bodies [sic] ability to adapt to these exercises.
Gee thanks, Kev.
By the way, about it being "no big deal"? That's one huge serving of thin privilege right there. Ignorance is no excuse.
Cheers,
Melanie (Fatadelic)
You'd think a kid who spent his time helping his disabled grandfather would at know how to spell one of the ailments that hindered his loved one.
Def?
Please. I'm sure he also knows the jungle cat as a "leppard."
He doesn't want me to pass judgement on him based on his eight hundred word essay? But I didin't get to write an eight hundred word essay for him to read before he passed judgement on me.
I hope, at the very least, he's learned to stop and think before he condemns and insults an entire group of people on the internet. For beer money.
Saying something you wouldn't otherwise say for beer money.....
Who does that? Anyone? Anyone?
Oh, I know!
Whores!
First, intelligently written and to the point. I didn't read his article some I'll have to get updated on that.
"but eating right and exercising is a solution" If it's a solution then why is it that 98% of fat people who do it don't lose the weight? That doesn't sound like a solution..... As for where i got that number it was attached to a study I believe the WW doesn't work study, but I'm not totally sure, i just mention that i didn't pull this number outta my bum, It is tied with a scientific study on the failure rate of diets.
""My point being that what you call insensitive may mask honestly good intentions" The road to hell is paved with good intentions... And who said my fattness what anyone else's concern?
amanda8501 - I took critical thinking in college!
But I totally agree with you and DeeLeigh.
Kelly_CS "I distinctly remember not being allowed to use textbooks as reference material. And that was before we had the internet, so we had to do actual research" Touche (sp?) It's still the same way in my Unversity! At least if you want to sound educated. There's limits to textbooks as pointed out.
"You must be told that you are fat so that you will do something to change it" Umm... No, It's none of anyone's business and two I'm not blind!!!!
SarahJ "An actual psychologist could have a field day examining mindsets like this" I'm not a "real" psych yet, i'm also an undergrad psych student but i will say this.... Brainwashed!
Hotchka - Exactly!!! Thank you.
Sorry it's long and written like this... but you all got a head start on me, and I couldn't help but comment. You all make very excellent points!
You can either hold yourself up to the unrealistic standards of others, or ignore them and concentrate on being happy with yourself as you are. ~Jeph Jacques
"You must be told that you are fat so that you will do something to change it" I'm on big FAT blog, which is part of the FATosphear. Why do I need some self-entitled, smarter-than-thou, boozehound to tell me something that I'm obviously aware of?
Oh and on the textbooks: In elementary school, my history books told me things like "Columbus discovered America," in Jr. High and High School, I had textbooks that told me things like "Condoms are useless, because they are full of holes that sperm can swim though." By the time I graduated high school I learned something very important: DON'T TRUST TEXTBOOKS.
When Kevin gets a beer belly from all that drinking he does and gets laughed at, maybe he'll realize ridiculing the fatties ain't such a good idea.
My daughter could write better when she was 14. Arguably even younger than that. But at least Kev gave me the idea for a funny new sig line. Really, the answer was sillier than the article
Zero isn't a size, it's a warning sign. - Carson Kressley
The Kevin Pease Beer Fund Foundation - Won't Someone PLEASE think of the psychology students?
We can but hope. Fat happens. He's 21 now - about the age when I started seriously packing it on. I wouldn't ever wish death on anyone (and I certainly don't recall anyone doing so on the previous thread) but a bit of weight gain and even some experience of the real world might encourage him to reconsider his position and be a little more measured with his prose.
Love the sig by the way Annie.
Thanks, Rich - very seldom I think of something funny lol. But I figure help the poor guy out
Zero isn't a size, it's a warning sign. - Carson Kressley
The Kevin Pease Beer Fund Foundation - Won't Someone PLEASE think of the psychology students?
I'd like the see the textbook excerpt where telling fat people they're fat (And thusly whatever...) causes them to change. The last things I read told me that not only is it not helpful, but it makes things worse. Can I get the article Kevin? Kthxbye.
What is so sad is that I think that our friend, Kevin Pease, actually thinks he's apologizing. In his heart of hearts he's saying, "Hey, give me a break, I'm a three-dimensional, caring person under it all. And perhaps I exposed you for the very first time to the harsh reality that fat is associated with health issues, since I don't expect that any of you could be as bright as I am, with my A average and all." While that subtext would be offensive enough, he also didn't see the additional subtext of "It's okay to be a bully for beer money and to entertain people who count, like thin friends, and not you one-dimensional FLOB people." He really didn't get it.
Kevin, honey, here's what a real apology might look like:
"I'm sorry. I need to think about these issues more. I will try to learn from this and become a better person and psychologist."
That would do it, I think.
I agree with you, Debra. But from what Paul wrote, Mr. Pease was not asking for an opportunity to apologize -- he just wanted to respond. Mr. Pease does not see the need to apologize because he believes that he did not do or say anything wrong. As much as I'd like for him to at least comprehend that his views are one-sided and based on faulty information (and to recognize the flaw in publishing a clearly biased screed), I'm not holding my breath for that to happen.
Deb, Kelly; Nail. Head. BANG!
This would be a *RESPONSE* in the shape and format of an apology. . . If you turn off most of the lights and glance at it, real quick, out of the corner of your eye.
Yah know. . . I was gonna do a long-winded rant but then decided to save Paul the space and just Blogged it. Nothing pisses me off more then the Concern Troll thing. Don't try to convince me that you're only saying whatever crap you happen to be spewing because your concerned for MY welfare. Got a news flash for you BOY; A lot of the people on this Blog are more knowledgeable just by dint of the fact that we are older than YOU. Those that are the same age or younger are CERTAINLY smarter. DO NOT slip and try patronize us. Just don't do it.
-DAILY AFFIRMATION:
>>To almost any problem, a good scapegoat is nearly as
welcome as a solution.<<
I once found a demonstrably poisonous compound being sold as an aphrodisiac in a porn shop. When I asked the counter-kid about it, he said "Scientists have proved this is safe."
I responded "Scientists also came up with the atomic bomb."
At which point, I was kicked out of the porn shop.
Unless he tells me *which* textbook he pulled his "backup" out of (backup which he never cited in the initial article) he's still running the risk of libel.
Oh yeah, I have a degree in journalism. You're still liable for libel on opinion pieces, kiddie. Maybe you ought to put down the beer and do a little more reading.
You can find me at:
http://fatchic.dianarajchel.com
http://magickalrealism.etsy.com
The most disturbing thing abut this is that this guy presumably wants to be a therapist, and yet it's a scientific fact that almost all psychiatric medications cause weight gain, some of them very significant weight gain. So it's highly likely that a lot of his patients will be overweight. This weight gain can be very traumatic for someone who's already going through a difficult time, and I feel very sorry for the people who are going to need his support and will get this kind of response.
Yeah, it really doesn't help when a therapist throws in weight-related comments where they don't belong.
I saw a therapist about a year ago when my fiancé was diagnosed with cancer. The drugs they put him on kept him from being able to care for himself, so all day every day all I had the time to do was take care of him. He slept while I was at work, but I came home during my lunch break, too, to make him lunch. I often didn't sleep at night because I was up taking care of him or taking him to the ER.
At the end of a session where the therapist seemed more interested in learning about how I was affected by this for his own morbid curiosity than in actually helping me, he threw in "eat right and exercise!" just as I was walking out the door. I felt like it was about my weight, but even if it was just friendly advise to take care of myself, too, just how did he figure I would have the time to go out to the gym or even just take a walk with what I was coping with? He didn't even ask about what I was eating at the time, which was usually whatever bland food my fiancé could keep down at the time. It was also very balanced food, since his liver was sick so we couldn't have too much protein or too much fat or too much of, well, anything.
Anyway, that's my little therapist rant.