The Wedding Gown Challenge (Hoax?)

Well, at least her name is right. Or almost right-it should be MEMEMEMEMEMEMEME!!! Look at fabulous, fabulous me! I would LOVE to see the counter-protest of fat women AND a counter-protest of men bulging out of their long-outgrown tuxes to prove how despicable this woman's thinking is. What a shallow, truly despicable human being.

Wow, narcissism run amok. I used to have a friend who believed that "keeping her figure" was the most important thing she could contribute to her marriage. She's now a bitter divorcÈe.

Wow. I'm glad I eloped. I like nellicat's idea... fat women showing up in their wedding dresses. And fat men could also show up in wedding dresses! Now if that isn't a headline grabber, I don't know what is.

I think a bunch of people (fat and thin) should show up with clothing or mementos from all of the great successes of their lives. Pictures of their children, maybe who they gladly gained weight to bear, pieces of projects, artwork, degrees, trophies, symbols of career success, etc... I think comparing a group like this, with all the confetti of their rich and well-lived lives surrounding them, to a bunch of broads whose priorities in life are so F'ed up as to put 'fitting into my wedding dress' at the top, would only prove who REALLY 'aspires to greater things.' It would put them to shame and expose how ridiculous their self-righteous crusading really is, and show that fat people aren't the only ones who think they're ridiculous.

All right. I love the idea. I'm not in NYC, but I know there are a slew of BFBers who are. Maybe we can get another group of people in on this, too? It's not just a fat issue - but the blog is making it one.

Wow...should I go too? I can still fit into my wedding dress...it's a custom made Jessica McClintock medieval gown in sloughed silk...in a size 28 baby! And I am 10 years and two kids into my marriage! Sheesh! Truly, tho, that poor woman has such poor self esteem that she bases her whole existance on fitting into one dress? How sad is that? Does she actually enjoy her life? Or does she just spend it counting calories and running to the gym when she could be home playing with her kids? I would rather spend it eating the cheese fries and hanging with my kids, thanks. Even if it meant I could no longer wear my wedding gown.

You know, when I started reading that I thought it was a positive thing because it said: "The Wedding Gown challenge is for women to stop thinking of their wedding day as the 'big day' when one starves her self into a state of unhealthy and unrealistic expectations, only to outgrow her gown on the honeymoon" I thought it was going to be something about the horrible things that women do to their bodies before they get married because if you don't get married in a size 6 you will hate it for the rest of your life. Alas, I was dissapointed. (That's what I get for reading the article before all of the blurp that's written here) I would show up in my wedding dress, as I am getting married in September so it sure as hell still fits (like a glove no less), but I would hate to get it dirty for her. I wonder if she realizes that they make plus size wedding dresses? Mine's a 22. :) (Arcadian - I'd love to see what you're dress looks like...) And when did gaining 10 pounds after the age 18 increase your chances of dying by 15%? I've got to tell my post-anorexic friend that - she gained about 30 pounds after 18...she should have just stayed anorexic I guess. Midknyt

Oh dear Lord. "Dump your friends who plan to grow fatter with every year. Surround yourself with those who aspire to greater things." So the highest aspiration a woman can have in life is to continue to fit into her wedding gown??? If I ever found out that this was the greatest ambition of one of MY friends, I would dump that friend and surround myself with those who aspire to, say, advance in their careers, or raise great children, or make a difference by volunteering (or all of the above). And how about this one: "Youíre a role model for all womenÖand this is your chance to make a difference." Wow. I love how women who are thin see it as some sort of moral triumph and believe that the world would be a much better place if we would all just follow their superb example.

Wow, that is the moral panic over obesity and the suppression of women via the message that women are only as good as their physical bodies are attractive in a nutshell. I still fit into my wedding dress. It's made out of one of those infinitely stretchable fabrics.

What a sad, sad woman! Her life must be incredibly miserable, for this to be her crowning achievement. I would consider myself an abysmal failure if the only thing I could brag about was still fitting into my wedding gown. I would much rather brag about taking flying lessons, earning a bachelor's degree, having a wonderful relationship with my husband, raising twin daughters - etc. Isn't this what feminism was supposed to bring us? The freedom to be somebody, not just a decorative appendage. This is exactly what is wrong with the diet-weight-loss obsessed person. I worked very hard to free myself from this behavior. I am GLAD, GLAD, GLAD that I don't think like her anymore!

If this is the best thing to which she can aspire, is that what she's going to have on her gravestone? That's the information she wants to leave to posterity? To heck with "beloved wife and mother". However, being able to fit in your wedding gown before you die is not going to allow you to escape the grim reaper, just like fat people, cuz we're all equal there.

Oh good Lord! Someone needs to smack some sense into this woman. Does she really expect to fit into her wedding dress for the rest of her bleedin' life? And is that such a worthy goal that she's wasting all this time on it? I probably still fit into my wedding dress, but I wouldn't know, as I had it preserved and you're not supposed to open the box. Why would I still need to fit into it? It's not like I'll have another occasion where I can wear it again! It is my personal opinion that wedding dresses are ridiculously overpriced anyway, especially for something you only...get...to...wear...once. Maybe that's the point of all this--these women will all get to put on those overpriced poufy confections again, instead of just leaving them to take up space in the attic or closet!

AmyZawn, I once saw a comedienne come out on stage in full bridal regalia: the gown, the veil, the whole works. Her opening words were "And they said I'd never get to wear this again!"

Is that thing for real? It seems like a parody of the ideas about how a wedding is a woman's One Big Day - just absurd.

What a twit. My mom weighed 118 lbs. at 5'4" when she got married in 1945. She weighed all of 100-110 lbs. when she DIED OF CANCER in 1991. Yeah, she was dying but SHE COULD STILL FIT INTO HER GOWN!!! Golly gee whiz!!! When she was at her healthiest my mom weighed about 150-160 lbs. and she looked just fine to me. I couldn't have cared less if she could fit into her gown or not. She put three kids through college (including me) and was married to the same man for 46 years. She could sew, cook, keep house, and balance the checkbook among other things. I would give anything to talk to her once more. MeMe Roth is a shallow, stupid woman and I wish she'd jump off a cliff.

"Dump your friends who plan to grow fatter with every year. Surround yourself with those who aspire to greater things." I don't know about you, but 'aspiring to better things' takes away from the time I can spend mindlessly running my rear off at the gym or blindly following some stupid diet. I had a choice - plant my once-skinny butt in a chair and do well in school and at work, or sacrifice my curiosity and intelligence to stay thin. I knew which was more important then, and still do. My friends, fat, thin, and in between, wouldn't be my friends were I shallow, diet-obessesed creature.

Hmmmm, if I win the lotto tomorrow I'll be booking a ticket to NY and digging out my wedding gown. I can fit into it quite nicely still and I think the sight of a 260 lb woman in a victorian style PURPLE and white wedding gown should be a lovely sight to see :) http://www.webpages.uidaho.edu/~bjcraw/graphics/dress/dress5.html (I really need to go in and rescan my photos).

Ah, this woman's obviously a f%&king moron--I know this is a forum where we exchange ideas and thoughts and stuff, but let's not give this skinny a$$hole too much credence--she does not define ANYTHING FOR ANYONE. I've been running into shills like her my whole life. And if you look real close, you'll see there's NOTHING on the INSIDE. Jeez, what a schmuck. Always, Adam Wilk

Remember that Oprah declared her weight loss on Optifast to be "her greatest achievement". This is an oft-repeated mantra among fat and formerly fat and never fat celebrities. MeMe is only parotting it.

in a perverse way, I enjoyed this...this...rant? insanity? tragedy? as a perfect example of the colonized mind of a member of an oppressed group (hard to imagine that upper-middle class straight white women are oppressed, sometimes, but here's proof). There are a lot of people who think like this and it is good to be reminded of it now and again. I don't want to kill her but to send this poor gal a copy of the The Beauty Myth. (though she may think reading anything but diet books and fashion mags is a waste of time) It's a sad mis-spending of a woman's life to fixate on trying to force her body into an unhealthy fashion ideal. Not to mention how this advice diminishes intimate human relations, touting marriage as only a consumer event for which the woman is the product and has to work to be "good product." Insulting as this is to women, it's equally insulting to men! Men are capable of much more than this; there are men posting here who clearly are. She's not really advising US, of course...she's repeating to herself the haunting, shaming, awful crap that is floating around in her own head, torturing her. I was there once, I admit, and reading this makes me pity her... and feel so, so grateful for my own trip out of such a self-hating place and up into the light of self-acceptance and simultaneously into the power of focusing on the real stuff of life. Thank you, fat acceptance and anti-diet and feminist movements for helping me save myself from such a mindset! Pray goddess this one saves herself, too.

I wonder how she would feel about my friend who can no longer fit into her wedding dress because it is too big. I can tell you that dropping from a size 10 to a 6 did nothing for her marriage. (she is now divorced. Her husband ran off with a disheveled artist who was 10 years older than her and NOT a size 6). Also, what about the men that may save clothes from college but sure the hell can't wear them anymore?

There are a few distinctly mean-spirited comments about BFB over there now, so I had to leave my post too. It's people like Meme and her ilk that are going to perpetuate the discrimination against fat people.

I have a hot pink wedding gown (never used for matrimonial purposes, just for heightened visibility in Fat Revolutionary moments!), and I'm not afraid to use it. When I was a freshman in college, my Western Civ course required students to read Hesiod's writing on the oikos (household, in Greek, root for our word economics). I remember with absolute clarity, the moment I read his statement (as I recall it), "If you want to start an oikos, get yourself an ox, an as, and a woman, in that order." The professor expected students to disregard the profound sexism and pay attention to the cultural/economic attitudes and how they relate to modern culture/economics. I think the sexism of Hesiod is not greatly diminished now. This woman's image of herself in her wedding dress is what defines her...physically, mentally, socially, in every way possible. She's an excellent pack animal, carrying all those definitions with her of what it means to be a woman. (And what kind of woman *isn't* married!?!)

Paul, I really think this woman might just be trying to get attention by raising a controversial topic that's sure to get a knee jerk reaction. Her blog only has two posts on it. And the two posts say pretty much the same thing. I guarantee that once this Wedding Day Challenge is done, her blog will go the way of the do-do bird, unless she finds another controversial obesity topic to glom onto. Also, in a weird way, I sense a lot of pain in this woman. The way she rants about getting fat and dying young, it sounds like she's been through something traumatic, but she can't express it except blaming fat people and then foaming at the mouth. I would rather cross the street then cross paths with Meme, because this kind of rabid hatred of other people is really ugly, ultimately.

I've seen where MeMe has made some TV appearances. I'm not judging by blog posts alone, but I'm always wondering if sites like these are just elaborate trolls. The blog really isn't a blog, but a page with a press release. I hadn't noticed that comments were open on the first entry, and it's become something of a flashpoint for people who hate BFB (and freedom! Freedom haters!) (Er, sorry.) In any case I think our efforts would be better suited towards organizing a protest against this, if it in fact goes down.

That is..."an ox, an ass, and a woman."

I think this chick is a creation of some sort (even her name suggests a ploy to spread a viral idea ... meme) . Someone's having fun at the public's expense. Sure, she's flesh and blood but I think she's about as authentic an individual as Aunt Jemima. Her "Wedding Challenge" has been carefully place in just about all of the newswire sites. Whoever created this "Meme" must be overjoyed that the size acceptance blogs are picking it up. This thing is going to pick up speed.

I thought I would add something to the "meme." In Turkish, meme refers to a women's breast. Interesting? kelebek

Apparently, "MeMe" Meredith Roth is a chairperson of the Search Engine Marketing Professional Organization (SEMPO) whose mission is, "to increase awareness and promote the value of search engine marketing worldwide." I suspect Ms. Roth is marketing this "Wedding Gown Challenge" for some, as yet, unnamed company (no doubt on August 5th it will be ..um..unveiled) . She has tried her hand at various kinds of marketing strategies but her latest one seems to be the most successful.

Wow, nice work, folks. I'm pulling the link and will be amending the original post.

A little birdie sent me a slew of links about Meredith Roth. Interesting. She wanted to ban cupcakes at kids' birthday parties. She's listed here as an anti-obesity advocate who wanted junk food out of schools. It also got some play elsewhere. So, a hoax? A search engine optimization contest? Something to get us in a huff? Interesting....

Also, the WHOIS for meredithpr. (Hopefully the link won't die....)

The timing of her arrival in the media is suspicious too, Paul. It's as if she came into existence (on paper, anyway) only last year and within the past two months she's generated a MeMe blitz which seems destined to come to a head in August.

Cool, I could go if it was local. I still fit into my size 24 wedding dress. ;) There is so much pressure for people getting married to lose weight so they look good in the wedding photos. I look damn good in my wedding photos I'll have you know. At least I don't look like a stranger. There is a woman here who went on Atkins for about 6 months before her wedding, losing a heap of weight which she promptly put back on even faster immediately after the wedding. The photos she has do not even look like her. :(

Wow, I am glad to see all the comments and the research on "MeMe." This is all very suspicious, but it seems like it's the nature of the internet that it doesn't even matter how serious MeMe is, because other people are obviously taking it seriously, given the comments by men and women on the blog. I got the link from a friend who found it on someone's knitting blog, who clearly took it seriously.

Thinking of this post today I was reminded of Miss Haversham from "Great Expectations."

Hey, maybe she's actually on *our* side, and she's just doing all of this to show how completely ridiculous anti-fat people can be.

There's a phone number that's in all the articles about her, saying "PR inquiries only". It's for Atlanta. She's in New Jersey. I'm not sure what that means, other than she's trying to look like a "little/regular person" on a big mission, when she's got a professional PR company working *for* her. Thing is, why use one in Georgia when you've got access to NYC? Something seems weird.

The whole thing smacks of a marketing/pr company trying to ascertain people's reactions to fat/fat people and "overweight" (whatever that is), perhaps in the wake of the CDC debacle and the Flegal study. It sounds and looks about as genuine as silicon breast enhancers.

My mother gained a lot of weight in middle age (probably genetic) and she spent her entire life helping others, was married for decades to her soul mate, took a job teaching Native American teenagers nobody else wanted to do and worked miracles with them, worked in a defense plant during World War 2, took in her relatives when they needed help, raised 2 kids, spent years working like crazy taking care if her elderly parents, and much more. Everybody liked her, she did a huge amount of good in her life, and was greatly mourned when she died. That's a lot better legacy then always fitting into your wedding dress. by the way, Mom didn't have a usual wedding dress. my parents had a small ceremony. and she wore her good dress, not a wedding gown.

I guess no one told this woman that walking around in a wedding dress when you're not getting married makes you look like some kind of crazy loon. Oh wait, maybe it's her veiwpoint that makes her look loony!

(This is long. I don't mean to offend anyone with the length). Does this woman have the faintest clue how sexist she sounds? She almost makes Nietsche look like a raving feminist. ìContributing to the obesity epidemic is unacceptable...î WHAT epidemic? ...îunhealthy.î Fat and health have poor correlations at best. I think MeMe really meant to say ìmakes me uncomfortable.î ì...a ridiculous role model for the next generation of wives and mothers.î What about the next generation of lawyers, doctors, engineers, scientists, journalists, retail clerks, waitresses, mechanics, pilots, advocates, psychologists, social crusaders...Is a healthy acceptance of body size ìridiculousî for them, since they donít fit MeMeís mold? (which just happens to be a mold uncomfortably close to the Victorian ìideal womanî: wife, mother, and arm candy for her man). "Somewhere between the wedding reception and delivery room, many women abandon their brains, body and libido." We can see where women like MeMe abandoned their brains by striving day in and day out for an impossible (sexist) ideal; betrayed their bodies through semi starvation or compulsive exercise, all so some manófor whom theyíve ìonlyî borne children and loved and cherishedówill want to continue bedding them. ìItís wrong to be fat. Itís easy, but itís wrong.î Thereís so much to say to that, yet itís so staggering, I can only say little. Fat is an adjective, not a sin. Thin is an adjective, not a virtue. And, thanks to bigots like MeMe, ìeasyî is the one thing being fat is not. ìDump your friends who plan on growing fatter every year.î Plan?! Did she actually say people PLAN to get fat??? Goodness me, that makes it sound like one can simply will oneself fat, and would do so out of sheer malice. I suppose it makes sense for a woman who clearly believes one can just as easily ìwillî the weight away. Besides, who should we dump them for? Shallow, stupid, controlled, easily bidden women whose exciting ìplanî is to make sure they can fit their wedding dresses on the day they die? Would that be the ìgreater thingî MeMe means? Then we come to: ìStop scapegoating your pregnancies.î So...first of all, weíre definitely ìsupposedî to become pregnant, or thereís something ìwrongî with us, but weíre never to look it? Even though body fat is crucial to female reproduction? Is she even trying to make sense? I donít agree with personal insults, but this woman (whoever she is) is an idiot. Of course, she HAS to believe her own reasoning, otherwise, her ìabilityî to fit into her wedding gown is no longer a virtue and she might have to actually do something meaningful to gain notice. Hereís a little help for ya, MeMe: A person who uses anotherís appearance to make assumptions about him or her, and then uses those assumptions to treat him or her differently than others, IS A BIGOT!!! Donít ask me to change my body, just so you wonít have to change your mind.

If being thin is someone's greatest achievement, I have to wonder whether or not they finished school. Did they graduate from high school? How about college? I'd say either of those is a greater achievement in this day and age. Have they ever volunteered somewhere? Have they ever made someone's day? What about careers? What about relationships with children, families, and friends? There is something wrong with a culture that values physical perfection over actual, honest-to-goodness accomplishments.